This morning I decided to make some deliberate time for some personal meditation. I have been giving thought my cards this week. I asked several wonderful people in the group some specific questions. They were kind enough to answer a few questions that I had. I was so grateful too.
I have several decks of cards and I remember the features that drew me to them for each one. Over time I grew to prefer others and had difficulties with others. This morning I got my 3 favorite decks out and put them in order. (The Radiant RW deck, The Morgan Greer Deck and the Gay Tarot)
I took the Radiant RW Deck out and put it side by side with the Morgan Greer deck. I began to go through the cards one by one. I could see the meanings easily in the Radiant RW deck and I would look at the other one and perhaps not see it in the same way. I looked for the colors, images, the symbols, the back ground, body language, was there motion and so forth. I stayed with each card until I could see why the artists choose those images for those cards. I had to get out of my safe zone, memorized meaning, and preconceived ideas and ask what did emotions and concepts did they convey.
It was tough and time consuming, but it began to flow and to click. I could see the same idea and concept from different angles. As my momentum grew I sort of got apprehensive as I approached the cards that I knew gave me trouble. I did the same thing and it worked
I began to feel as if I was mediator between decks that could not get along. I decided to handle them like people. Both had valid points, and concerns. Both had passionate opinions to make. Both needed patience, empathy and understanding. Both had to find a meeting point. I realized that some of my favor of one deck over another was NOT about the elements, content, or style, it was about fear of being wrong, not understanding or worse yet looking foolish. I realized that was Ego trying to control the cards and the outcome.
I repeated the process with the third deck. It really opened up and began just come alive with illumination. I had made peace with the three of them. Now I can pick up any of those decks and read from it without worrying that this card, or that other one I do not like as much will show up. I thought about what the card in general means to me and what deck best said that in a way I could understand and also taking the time necessary to understand and unlock that I did not understand. It just felt like such a break through moment. It also felt liberating as well.
Now all that to say, is this. There are some I do prefer than others still BUT that preference is now based on taste and comfort rather than fear. I again was reminded when we let go of fear, our hands are then fully open and capable to reach out to the Universe waiting to catch and embrace us with both arms!